Weekly Round-Up

Interesting week.

Mitt "He just looks Presidential" Romney hears voices. During the GOP debate, debate fans (Freaks and Geeks?) heard a voice from beyond give Gov Romney a "prompt" when answering a "trick" question from Tim Russert. Lots of ideas, Huffpo gets huffy, but me? Well, I'm going where no one dares go (I mean, this is what you don't pay me for right?). I say it was one of the Latter Day Saints. An unidentified whisper helping out Mormon Mitt? Gotta be. Poor Huck. He had to be there wondering why the Former Day Saints let him down. And by "down" I mean both financially and with the votes.

Feeling heady with the Big Guy in his head, Mitt of Arc then spouts off with,

Well, I'm not concerned about the voters.

Which is only fair, because it looks like the voters are less and less concerned with him.

Someone who won't be hearing from the Spirit in the Sky until she makes a "sorry" is ESPN Hostess with the Mostess (booze) Dana Jacobson. At a Celebrity Roast for Mike Greenberg and Mike Golic (its OK, I'll wait while you read that again...yup, not a misprint, I know, go figure) Ms Jacobson said some naughtys about Notre Dame, Touchdown Jesus, and the actual Jesus. Could it have been the booze talking? Here are some pics, you decide. Yup.

Big deal in the Big House. The Supremes rule that inmates cannot sue for lost property. So what if Hacksaw Jones can't sue to get his shiv back you say? Read the comments.

The confusion in the courts comes because the immunity is mentioned in a section of the law that blocks lawsuits against the government over the "loss of goods, merchandise or other property" detained by customs or excise officers. The law then adds "or any other law enforcement officer."

"Congress could not have chosen a more all-encompassing phrase than 'any other law enforcement officer' " to show that it intended broad immunity, Justice Clarence Thomas wrote for the majority. Therefore, the law "forecloses lawsuits against the United States for the unlawful detention of property by 'any' not just 'some,' law enforcement officers."

That's right folks, according to Clarence "Strict Constructionist" Thomas, "any" law enforcement officer can take anything from you and you have not right to recourse. Now, I'm no legal scholar (I roll with the illegal scholars), but I thought I read somewhere about an Amendment that prevents just such a thing. But wouldn't a Supreme Court Justice know that? Lets see...its somewhere around here...what did I do with my pocket Constitution? Oh, that's right I lent it to Ron Paul when he crashed on my couch awhile back and we were rappin 'bout evolution. Hold on, I'll Google it. Here we go, Find Law says,

blah blah blah...nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

Oooooh, I did, I did, I did taw a Fit Amentment. To my astigmatic eyes, it looks like you cannot just take something from a prisoner without due process, and private property cannot be taken "just 'cause," even if there's just cause. Seems to me that if Congress says "any" law enforcement officer can take anything with immunity, a "Strict Constructionist" should say, "nice law Congress, but take it back for a do over." Why not here? Maybe "Strict" is one of those slang words like when "bad" means "good." See, then it makes sense. "Strict Constructionist" means "Constitution don't matter." Who knew the Court was so hip?

Hip hurtin'? Got a script for your "medical" marijuana? Still gonna git the pink slip. And no I don't mean 'ludes (are those even still around? I'm way behind in my cool drug references).

Clearly someone was abusing their "medical Mary J" when they came up with the Britney Industrial Index. Single greatest economic idea I've ever heard, and yes McGinty that includes your idea in the 90's to move towards a "beanie baby based economy." I figure the Unknown Blogger Industrial Index is a solid $1.25, but once you factor in paid subscriptions to the H-blog, it skyrockets to $1.25.

All those "prescriptions" for wacky weed are making things hard for everyone (takes a lot of water to fill all those bongs). Nuclear power (siiiigh, again, the most expensive form of energy...ever) is once again in the news. Apparently those reactors are facing water shortages and may have to shut down. New cost, on top of the crazy, insane amount it costs already?

"Currently, nuclear power costs between $5 to $7 to produce a megawatt hour (ed note, no, no, no!)," said Daniele Seitz, an energy analyst with New York-based Dahlman Rose & Co. "It would cost 10 times that amount that if you had to buy replacement power — especially during the summer."

Now that gets me steamed.

Where to start?

Some quick hits to get us out of the gate.

Pope Says Gays are bad for peace. I don't know about that, haven't really seen the studies. But I do feel the need to point out that a German Pope is saying,

that a traditional family led by a husband and wife instilled values that promote peace.

Now, I don't want to point out the obvious, but I'm pretty sure Nazi Germany had a high "family rate" and they were definitely hostile to the gays, but oddly, not a lot of peace. In fact, as I review my history, lots of wars started by lots of nations with lots of families. I'm just not sure that gays are the big threat facing the world today, maybe we should focus our attention elsewhere. On a roll, he says,

Those who are hostile, even unknowingly, to the institution of the family ... make peace fragile for the entire national and international community.

He's looking at you New Hampshire and you're gay love...love. Not only are you on the forefront of determining the next "Most Powerful Person in the World*" but you're also at the forefront for the next World War! Lots of pressure on the Granite State. My protest sign? Civil Unions=Civil Wars!

Speaking of War, McCain pulled an Unknown Blogger and returned strong for 2008! How'd that happen? Latest poll has them at a tie. Clearly the fine people of NH don't read the H-Blog. If they did, they would know that we declared McCain yesterday's news way back in July 2007. Come on people pay attention, I'm prognosticating here.

In other election news, Mike Huckabee has decided that wrapping himself in the flag is soooo tacky. The Cross is much, much better. Between ads with not so subtle "God's Behind Me!" themes, and "Take a knee for me" slogans, Ol' Mike is not so much asking for the Religious Conservative Vote as begging for it. Maybe that's why he's on his knees so much. No push back from me, I'm a big fan of free speech, and talking about religion is clearly speech so I say, Keep on Truckin'. But, as a voter, I'm a bit weary of Christ as the new Flag.

Did you say Fag? Looks like gay couples get "divorced" too. And when they do, not so fun. Welcome to the club boys (and girls). My advice? RUN! You can cheat nature, but you can't cheat the statistics.

Just ask Olympic Champion Justin Gatlin who tried to run and cheat nature, but he too got caught (who knew sprinting was so gay?). Busted for doping, the Gold Medalist is out for Beijing. Again, I renew the call for The Unknown Blogger's Simple Solution For Cheating (and cure for Ricketts). It's right there folks, yours for the taking. Maybe if I could get some media attention.

Me and Ron Paul. FOX News, "Fair and Balanced" unless you annoy us is not allowing Mr. Paul to play with the other kids at the big debate. Something about polling numbers, but wait, Mr. Paul is polling better than former Belle of the Ball Fred Thompson who made the cut (sort of like the number one draft pick who's clearly a bust but teams keep bringing him in because "Hey, he was the first pick in the draft! Maybe he'll turn it around for us.") There's also a rant about the power and danger of media control and the new FCC arguments for rules allowing for more consolidation. Oh well, given how we all love and trust the media, its all good right? For the record, I think FOX caves and Mr Paul makes the list.

In other news, the Unknown Blogger promises vows to create policy that will insure that the sun will rise tomorrow. Mike Huckabee vowed a defense build-up that would produce

"a military of sorts that no one on earth would want to take us on."

Really, does he feel like that's not the case now? Who's looking to take us on? I love it when a politician creates a controversy around something I already have, then promises to give it back to me the way it was before he created the controversy. Especially when it will cost billions. If you're keeping track at home, we already have an untouchable military. Unless he's saying that it's no longer untouchable, which then seems like a direct attack on the Bush Administration.

Really quick...Hillary and Obama neck and neck. Guiliani in a free fall. Romney, up down, all around, getting dogged, and spending loads, but still the front runner.

Whew, that's the US update. I think some things are going on elsewhere, but that doesn't really matter anyway...right?

*Can't even say "Most Powerful Man in the World" anymore thanks to that woman Hillary Clinton.